Building Your ‘Pack’

Originally published on 29 June 2022

I have often thought of myself as a lone wolf. I am definitely more of an introvert in my personal life than an extrovert. A professional role that would involve having to ‘network’ or ‘build partnerships’ would have made me run for the hills before. It is only after having reflected on my professional life for the last decade or so that I have realised that I have built up what I like to call my ‘pack’. It isn’t hundreds of people, but it is enough meaningful, valuable connections worthy of a ‘pack’.

Why is the pack important? For generalists especially, a pack can provide you with outside perspectives on things you may have missed and specialist knowledge that you might not have. What makes up the pack? There are loads of business articles that talk about mentors – those are important too and I will discuss them here – but a pack is wider than that. It also includes colleagues, your professional network, and your friends. I don’t include family in this because they are part of your pack no matter what.

Colleagues

We usually don’t get to pick our colleagues. However, we do get to pick the ones we would go that extra mile for and whom we would keep on our personal/professional journey. I have been fortunate enough to have found a few of these colleagues along each of my professional stops – civil society, politics, and higher education. They have become friends but also people I continue to brainstorm ideas with and speak to regularly about where we go next on our different journeys.

You often stick to the colleagues within your department/unit/division. I urge you to branch out. Siloed organisations and company cultures never benefit from siloed teams or colleague relationships. By virtue of my last position, I had to work across so many different departments, so I learned the value of building relationships with people across a variety of functions. Some days it could be sitting with my boss’s executive assistant and problem-solving a particularly difficult speaking event with her and, others, it could be brainstorming ideas with a colleague from the fundraising office on a project she was trying to put together. We each brought different knowledge and skills to the table which allowed us to catch each other’s blind spots or spark new ideas.

Also, colleagues do not need to be your friends. You can also ditch the ones that do not serve you. I was reading an article from Harvard Business Review recently about what makes successful female networkers. It discusses how some women cut ties with old work connections that no longer served them as they move up in their careers. Initially, I did not agree with the sentiment because I have kept so many colleagues from my past but, upon reflection, this is true. If the relationship is not mutually beneficial, then cut it. There is no point in hanging on to the past if that connection no longer serves either of you.

Mentors

Get yourself a mentor. I have no wise words on how to find one because mine have always found me. I remember reading in Sheryl Sandberg’s Lean In some time ago that if you have to ask someone to be your mentor then the answer will probably be a no. She reasoned that you need to stand out for a potential mentor to notice you and want to mentor you. I am not sure if it does work this way and I am not necessarily sure I have ‘stood’ out in any particular way that has meant I have found my mentors. Either way, they have been invaluable to me.

Mentors can be formal or informal, but you will know when you have found yours (you could also have a few). They will guide you. They will be honest with you. They will tell you when you’re crying in their office about something silly, as one of my earliest mentors did, “to swallow a spoonful of cement and harden the fuck up”. Mentors sometimes know you better than you know yourself at times because they can see your potential and will push you to reach that potential.

If you have the opportunity to mentor someone, do it. A mentee is an equally important part of the pack.

Professional Network

I couldn’t think of an apt name for this group apart from ‘professional network’. They are in your professional network, but I am not talking about every person you meet at an event, meeting, conference, workshop, etc. These are people you meet along the way in your professional or even personal journey. It could be a chance meeting through friends or work, but it will be a professional connection that you know you need to foster because you just click.

In the same way that you pick which colleagues or friends you want in your life, pick who you want in this group and cultivate that relationship. Make that effort to send an email or connect on LinkedIn and send a message. You never know, it could lead to a job opportunity down the line, they could be someone that you could call on for advice or industry knowledge, or they could end up in one of the other groups on this list.

Friends

Friends are an important part of the pack. Not only for the support they provide but they provide great insight and can expand your range and knowledge. If you have some outside your industry, even better.

I know we spend most of our time working and so when it comes to social time, talking about work is not necessarily what you want to do but for some reason, we often end up doing it anyway. Our friends actually provide a valuable sounding board for ideas and problem-solving, as well as venting about the workweek. So, share that idea or problem, it might just lead to some inspiration.

The importance of the ‘pack’

Building your professional pack takes a bit of time. People will come and go but the ones who stick are worth it. You learn more about yourself and the world with others. The pack will be there when you need advice on a career change or if you’re having a tough day at your new job. If you make an effort to cultivate your pack, you will hopefully have a group of people to call on throughout your professional journey.